Long ago, somewhere in the lower income side of Walla Walla,
Washington, a fellow
named "Eddie Spaghetti," after ingesting a large quantity of various
mind altering substances, had plunged head-long into a lengthy rant.
During this delirious string of insults and exaggerated claims, he had
unwittingly invented several new words. He was well aware of the
literal impact of the word "ape", that is that it could be used as an
adjective. This form of the word simply meant "crazy." You may have
heard the term "Ape-sh#t." This tells us that "ape" is describing
"sh#t." Using the same logic, Eddie created several other delightful
combinations. Some were: "Ape-Loc" (Loc, a derivative of the urban
language Ebonics, meaning 'a local'), "Ape-Sauce", and "Ape-Dog".
Dog was often added to the end of names in Eddie's speech. He would
change your first name a little, often a simple abbreviation, then
would add a "Dog" to the end of it. If he referred to you in this way,
that meant he respected you and felt you deserved a title more
dignified than your birth name. My title was "B-Dog". But something
happened when he uttered the word "Ape-Dog". No longer was he using
"Dog" in combination with the prefix to create a title. What he meant
by "Ape-Dog" was Ape-Sh#t 2.0, Uber Ape-Sh#t. It meant a state of
advanced hysteria in
which one would be either violent, angry, or intense to such a degree
it had no title until the invention of the word "Ape-Dog".
"I'm f-in' ape-dog bowbie!" he said. Everyone knew what he meant. He
meant that he had taken too much and was now approaching some
form of a breakdown. After recovering from his stupor, the use of the
word developed further.
He started using it to describe a certain level of intoxication. Then
it became an all-purpose pseudonym for "crazy" or "out of control".
Then he envisioned ape-dog as a creature. It was part ape; part dog. He
got this idea one day while watching the show "CatDog" that aired on
Nickelodeon. He even made a theme song. He said the song was original
but it bore a striking resemblance to the "CatDog" theme song. It went:
"Ape-Dog!
AAAAApe-Dog!....
Kinda like CatDog but a lot more Violent"
Simple, yet catchy.
The genius of Eddie Spaghetti's grammatical accomplishments was honored
by few. One of these few was Brian Gurnett who named his video
production company after this divine state of enraged lunacy.
Thank You Eddie Spaghetti.
You are a legend.